i’m not mental, i’m just mavis

Mary-Ellen: “It’s so… interesting seeing you hanging around again, Mavis…”
Mavis: (long stare/pause) “…Mary-Ellen, you were great tonight.  It’s so inspiring to see a single mother with so much confidence on stage.  Really.”
Mary-Ellen: …

Hahaha, I’m in one of those moods today/this week/month.  Mavis Month, I guess.  I’m also going to begin to type using proper capitalization instead of my e.e. cummings thing — I’ve always typed in all lower-case, but for no particular reason.  It’s sort of looked down upon by those who care, I guess.

Got off early from work tonight, only agreed to leave by promising myself that I’d do something productive when I came home.  So far I’ve just screwed around on wordpress and skimmed through my friends page on Facebook (let me tell ya, it’s not very thrilling) and yeah, it’s nice to just sit here and be quiet.  Work is so fucking noisy.  People chatting non-stop, constantly, endlessly — it’s exhausting.  I get so sick of talking all the time and explaining shit to people who don’t listen yet expect me to deliver total patience in return.  Controlling my temper with these people has been integral lately.  I realize I won’t always get away with “copping an attitude” or whatever.  Sometimes it feels like the “real world” is actually ran by my mom and dad.

Currently reading “The Virtue of Selfishness” by Ayn Rand which is actually quite compelling and easy for me to get into.  I can follow her writing style quite easily.  Of course it’s pretty dry and lacking in any style, but she’s very direct about her statements.  I don’t know what to think of her, I’ve gone back and forth about it since college.  I remember I took an Ethical Theory course in college and my professor applied a lot of emphasis on her and at the time I didn’t understand why.  I guess it’s because I think she’s creepy looking.  But, she’s pretty much like a prophet in some ways, I suppose.  I wish I had the mental patience/endurance to read “Atlas Shrugged” — damn it’s such a lengthy book, but I really want to read it.  I just know that if I buy it I’ll end up sitting it on my bookshelf with the rest of my reading procrastination-pile.  I regret not using my vacation time to catch up on all of these books I’ve bought over recent time.  That good old college discipline has certainly worn off.

Well, I’m going to take a bath or something.  I probably should.  No clean laundry, so I’ve gotta figure that out.  Really I just want to climb into bed with Ayn Rand and listen to total silence and be completely alone.



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